Breaking Point
by Redd Phoenix
Summary: Snape's last moments as a true Death Eater before surrendering himself to Dumbledore.


TITLE: Breaking Point [1/1]  
AUTHOR: Samantha [kali_neba@hotmail.com]  
DISTRIBUTION: List archives. Anyone else, please ask first.  
SPOILERS: Slight ones for all four books  
RATING/CONTENT: R, violence, blood, death, language  
SUMMARY: Snape's last moments as a Death Eater before turning himself over to Dumbledore.  
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. The characters belong to JK Rowling.  
IMPROV: #6 -- more -- sweep -- period -- animal  
  
Everyone has a breaking point, that one moment when the limit has been reached, and everything just shatters under its own weight. There's only so much blood and bone and brain matter that a person can see before he can no longer function in anything resembling reality, when who he used to be no longer matters.  
  
Everyone has a breaking point, and I reached mine in the pouring rain in a small Scottish town with a child, dead, at my feet. A dead Muggle girl, no older than nine, and I was nearly in tears. She was just a Muggle, I told myslef, but it didn't help because I could still hear the ghosts of her whimpers through the patter of rain and I could still see the fear and confusion in her eyes in the green flash of _avada kedavra_.  
  
I swallowed heavily, drawing the coarse sleeve of my robe over my eyes, leaving a trail of rain water and blood over my forehead. The heady scent of sex and blood assaulted my nose as Lucius Malfoy stepped up beside me.  
  
"A good night, yes?" he asked, glancing from me to the little girl. He sneered, nudging her slightly with his boot. "A very good night," Malfoy whispered, answering his own question.  
  
"ANNA!" a scream came from the house to our left as a woman ran out of the doorway, her eyes on the girl.   
  
"Oh, and it just got better," Malfoy said, a smirk lighting his face as he stepped towards the woman running in our direction. He grabbed her around the waist, dragging her under the overhang of what had once been a bakery. Her screams filled the village, as one of the fellow members of the killing party shouted "Morsmordre!" sending the Dark Mark high into the night sky above the village.  
  
I heard Malfoy whisper, then saw a flash of green out of the corner of my eyes from the overhang. He stepped into the street and glanced at me. He sneered, adjusting his clothes and sweeping miniscule bits of dirty off his robes.  
  
"Time to go, Severus. The Dark Lord wants a report." I watched Malfoy head down the street towards the small gathering of Death Eaters there. None were paying attention to me; I was merely one more bit of darkness on the street. I glanced down at the girl -- Anna --, her face peaceful in a mockery of sleep. I swallowed again, my mouth dry, and I came to a decision.  
  
"No more," I whispered. "I can't...." The rain soaked into my robes, bringing with it a chill that had less to do with the rain and more with a dawning horror and growing conscience. I couldn't go back to Voldemort. I'd had enough of blood and murder and rape for one lifetime. I glanced up at the retreating back of Lucius Malfoy and felt a pang of bitter joy that I would never have to look at his face again and pretend to like him. However, the joy was brief, lasting a short period of time before reverting back to the more familiar dread and nausea.  
  
I stepped away from the girl and backed towards the woods on the edge of town. The shadows were easy to hide in, especially when one's companions are more interested in looting. I slipped into the night and Disapparated.  
  
I appeared seconds later near the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmeade. No rain was falling there, and it was slightly warmer than the previous village. It was a short walk through Hogsmeade, past the Three Broomsticks, ignoring the fluttering of curtains as people stared at me, the rain-soaked and pale stranger walking towards Hogwarts. I waited for someone to appear in front of me, wand ready, demanding to know who I was and what I was doing there. No one appeared and I made   
it to the familiar gates without incident.  
  
But the gates posed a different problem. They were locked, of course. It was summer holiday, the students were gone, and no one was here. I took one last look at Hogwarts and turned away. Then I heard something I wasn't expecting -- the sound of metal against metal. I turned back in time to watch the last of the chains fall away from the bars and the gates swing open of their own accord.  
  
I stepped onto the path and began to walk towards the castle situated on the hill. Soon, though, I was stopped in my tracks by the man standing in the middle of the path. He still looked the same as when I'd graduated two years ago. Beard dangling almost to his knees, wand tucked haphazardly into his belt, arms crossed, Dumbledore hadn't changed at all.   
  
"Hello, Severus," he greeted, and I walked the rest of the way up the path to him. He had known that I was coming. When I'd been a student, his omnipotence had terrified me, and it was nice to notice that that, at least, hadn't changed either.   
  
"Headmaster, I...." I began, but trailed off as words failed me. I glanced down at my hands, knowing that the blood stains weren't visible on the black gloved, but seeing them anyway. I knew what I looked like, robes dripping wet with eyes haunted and vaguely like a wounded animal's.  
  
"Tell me, Severus, are you here as the first wave of an attack? Or do you have something else in mind?"  
  
"I-I want...." I tailed off again, shivering suddenly. "I need to speak with you."   
  
"Then, come, Severus," he said, gesturing towards the front doors, "We have much to discuss."  
  
*END*  
  
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